Self Worth Quiz

1. You've been invited to a social networking gathering by a colleague where you don't know any of the attendees. You are also aware that most people at this gathering are more advanced in their career than you are. When you arrive, what do you do?

A: You decide to cling to your colleague and ask him/her to introduce you to attendees as you don't feel you have the courage to approach people on your own. You feel very intimidated being surrounded by others who are more advanced in their career, and you notice yourself being very self-conscious when speaking with others.B: You decide to approach a few people on your own to have a chat. You make a concerted effort to highlight your talents and skills when speaking with them, all the while comparing yourself to how you measure up to them. You notice yourself either judging yourself or judging others based on these comparisons.C: You look around the room and approach those people you find interesting. You ask a lot of questions and want to learn from everyone you meet. Although you realize that you are not as advanced in your career as some of the other attendees, you want to soak up as much wisdom as you can from them, and perhaps even make a few friends.

2. You've been asked by your boss to complete a big project within a short amount of time. He/She is counting on you to also make a presentation to the team about your findings. This is the first time you've been given this much leadership and responsibility. How do you handle this task?

C You feel both excited and a little bit nervous that you've been given this much responsibility. You also realize that this is your first big project like this, and so you treat it as a learning experience. You devote a good amount of time to the project, but not at the cost of your well-being. You don't put pressure on yourself to get it perfect. When you deliver the presentation, you take on board both the praise and constructive criticism from your colleagues. You are happy with your efforts.A You immediately feel a strong anxiety and worry over how you're going to do this. You feel overwhelmed and unmotivated to get started. You end up procrastinating as the thought of tackling this project seems too difficult. In the end, you either have to ask for an extension or end up putting something together last minute that doesn't deliver the standard expected. You feel disappointed with yourself and ruminate over your perceived failure.B You feel some anxiety over completing this task and make a point to do as much research as possible to get it 'perfect'. After all, you don't want to slip up in any way. You end up completing the project on time and delivering a good presentation. This has come at a cost though of over-exerting yourself and working overtime just to make sure you get this done to as high standard as possible. Despite your boss advising that you did a great job, you still feel you could have done 'better'.

3. You and your partner decide to go out for a fancy night of dinner and dancing. You both get dressed up and are looking forward to having a good time. Throughout the night, you notice that your partner is looking at many other good-looking people both at the restaurant and on the dancefloor. How do you respond?

B You feel slightly insecure about your self-image when you notice your partner glancing at other people who look nothing like you. You feel some slight jealousy and decide to do the same thing and check out other people too just to get back at your partner. You notice which people seem to grab your partner’s attention and decide you’re going to work even harder to impress your partner.A You immediately feel very insecure about your own self-image as you notice your partner glancing at other people that look nothing like you. You wonder if he/she finds them more attractive than you? You are clearly upset about this and your partner can read it across your face. You end up not enjoying yourself as much as you would have liked.C You pay attention to your partner when he/she is looking at other attractive people and decide to join in and comment on how good looking they are. You know what your worth is and can joke with your partner about the attractive people you both see in the room. You understand that it is normal to be drawn visually to other physically attractive people, but real attraction is more than skin deep. You feel secure in your relationship with your partner, and don’t need to question their motives.

4. You recently broke up with your partner and have been single for a few months. Meanwhile, all your friends are either in relationships, getting married, or having children. You also notice your family and relatives asking about your relationship status and when you’re finally going to settle down. How does this make you feel?

A You feel horrible and begin wondering whether there is something wrong with you because you are still single. You question what you did wrong that led to the breakup of your last relationship and you wonder if you will ever find someone else? You want to avoid any social gatherings where your ‘coupled up’ friends will be or any family situations where you will be asked questions by your family members about your ‘relationship status’.B You feel upset about the situation and decide that you need to do something about this – fast! You sign up to three different dating apps and feel determined that you will find someone else quickly. You end up going on lots of dates with random people as you can’t bear the thought of sitting at home alone. Although you like the feeling of excitement in meeting all these new people, you also feel disappointed when a date doesn’t really lead to anything serious or worthwhile.C You feel sad about the breakup, but also realize it just wasn’t meant to be. You give yourself time to process your emotions and decide to focus on self-care. You don’t want to jump into anything new with someone without first working through healing the wound from this relationship ending. You therefore focus on giving yourself what you need. You engage in hobbies and passions that give you a sense of joy, all the while looking back and reflecting on the lessons you can take away from this last relationship. You don’t feel any internal pressure to be with someone just to avoid being single.

5. You have worked quite hard throughout your life to achieve much financial success and abundance. You feel very proud of your accomplishments. Your company is doing very well, until one day you make a very bad business decision that ends up costing you more than you ever thought possible. Losing nearly all your assets and on the brink of filing for bankruptcy, what do you do next?

A You are devastated and feel like a complete failure. You believe everyone is judging you for your horrible mistake and feel ashamed of what’s happened. You don’t want to tell anyone because of the embarrassment and loss of reputation that you worked so hard to achieve. Your identity was largely attached to your role as a leader and you let your whole company down. You therefore don’t want to take any more risks and struggle with moving forward. You consider settling for getting a job that will be much easier and safer.B You feel extremely ashamed of what’s happened but vow to not show it. You don’t want people to really know how bad you feel. You decide you will hide away the truth and not reveal what’s happened. When people ask you about it, you get quite upset but deny fully owning up to your mistake. You therefore make up an elaborate story of what happened to try and salvage your pride and ego. You blame the circumstances and feel very sorry for yourself.C You may feel awful about what’s happened, but you take responsibility for your mistake. You understand that you are human and that your greatest failures are here to teach you your greatest lessons. You therefore humbly acknowledge the truth and be transparent about it with others. You decide that you will keep moving forward and find a solution to bounce back. You know that you can fail forward and you let go of punishing yourself. Others admire your courage and attitude to not give up.

6. You have had a busy week and feel exhausted from all the tasks you have been needing to complete both at home and work. You are really looking forward to the weekend to just relax and do nothing. On Friday evening, you receive a message from a relative who asks if you can help them out with moving the next two days as their partner has become ill. You realize that moving furniture is the last thing you want to be doing on the weekend, especially since you had planned some time to relax and unwind. How do you respond?

A You decide that your relative really needs you and you don’t want to disappoint them. You say yes, knowing that you won’t feel guilty for upsetting them. You feel frustrated however that your big relaxing weekend has gone down the drain. You help them out but all the while wish you were at home enjoying some movies. You think, well at least now if I need help, they will be able to repay me.C You understand that your relative needs help, but you are also aware that your own self-care needs are really important too. You think about how you will feel the entire next week at work if you don’t give yourself the rest you need, and you can see how negatively this will impact on your well-being. You therefore politely decline stating that you would love to help but already have prior commitments that you need to attend to. You suggest a few other solutions that your relative can try. You don’t feel guilty for looking after your needs.B You struggle to decide what to do and therefore choose not to respond at all. You think, well at least if I don’t respond, it may look like I didn’t receive the message. You still feel guilty the whole weekend even when you are relaxing at home, because a part of you knows that your relative is left hanging. You prefer to avoid situations that are uncomfortable though. The next time you see your relative, you notice they are more distant and tense around you.

7. You have been dreaming to start your own business of helping other people and travelling the world. It makes you feel excited whenever you think about it! Your family and friends however keep pointing out how this is a very risky decision, since you have never done anything like this before and may fail. They recommend you stay with your secure corporate job that is familiar and safe, and avoid taking such big risks. You know you don’t feel happy in your current job role and dream about this business daily. What do you do?

C You decide life is too short to waste away at a job that you don’t like. You thank your family and friends for their feedback, and decide to take the risk anyway. You tell yourself, that even if you fail, you can learn from it and keep moving forward. You save up some money that will hold you over for a few months to get things going. You plan your exit strategy and step into the unknown, fully realizing you have no guarantee that it will work out.A You begin to think about all the things that could go wrong if you decide to start this business and how awful it would feel to fail. You also begin worrying that you may not have what it takes to succeed. Because there are so many unknowns, you listen to your family and friends and decide to stay with your secure job. Even though you are not happy here, at least you are not failing.B You really want to leave your current job, but also understand the risks. You keep telling your family and friends that one day you will leave. Every time the thought of leaving comes up, you seem to find an excuse as to why you need to wait a little longer to take action. You may need to save some more money, and just do a bit more research, and find a few more resources, and maybe take a few more seminars on entrepreneurship. Even though you plan to start that business one day, you keep putting it off till tomorrow because the timing isn’t quite right at the moment.

8. You and your partner have gotten into a really bad argument the other day. It spiralled out of control and you both said some pretty horrible things. You felt a lot of sadness and hurt. The next morning, you still feel the tension within your body when you see your partner. How do you respond to your partner when you see them?

C You step back and examine how you both created this situation. You take responsibility for your actions and words and decide to apologise for these things. You also let your partner know that when they said certain things, it made you feel sad and hurt. You express your desire to want to resolve the problem and reconnect, so you can move past this current issue. You ask if your partner is willing to do the same? You are willing to forgive your partner for their actions, while maintaining your boundaries of what is acceptable/non-acceptable behaviour.B You feel completely hurt by your partner. How could they say such horrible things to you? You feel rejected and start questioning whether they really love you. You decide that until your partner ‘proves’ their love for you, you will not be pleasant and give them the silent treatment. After all, they should be the one to come and apologise. You’re not sure if you could forgive your partner for what they’ve said.A You feel awful the next day and begin questioning your actions and what you said. You begin worrying that you may have pushed your partner away and that they will no longer want to be with you. You also criticize yourself for losing control over your emotions like that. You feel insecure that the relationship may end. This leads you to want to do everything in your power to keep your partner. The next day, you apologise profusely, give them a really expensive gift, and swear you will never behave like that again.

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