Finding Your Flow
Finding Your Flow:
The balance between ‘doing’ and ‘being’ which leads to synchronicities and less struggle in manifesting our desires
It’s that time of year now….the New Year’s Resolutions have been set and you may be finding yourself in that space of realising you either haven’t started acting on your goals or you may be losing the momentum and drive with which you began this year. After a period of collective celebration of a New Year, many people experience a low when realities set in of how the last year unravelled, and what we want the next one to look like.
If you happen to be in this category of experiencing post New Year blues, don’t worry. It happens to almost everyone. I experienced my own week of low motivation after returning from a tropical holiday over the winter break. I felt overwhelmed about the amount of big action items I needed to jump into this year and some doubt trickled in regarding my own capabilities which created a negative combination of low mood and procrastination.
And here is where the majority of self-development messages out there state – ‘just start taking action and you will feel better’. Or ‘you have to keep going even if you don’t feel like it’, ‘you have to push through all them negative emotions with more action and stay disciplined’.
Now while that may work up to a point…what I’ve noticed, is there is a much easier way to get back on track. Sometimes you will not be able to take action, UNTIL you deal with the emotional blocks that are preventing you from taking action.
Masculine and Feminine Energies
So have you ever asked yourself how you FEEL when you are taking action steps on your goals and dreams? Do you feel overwhelmed and anxious when you are sending those emails, making those phone calls, getting through your to-do list? Or do you feel excited, relaxed, calm, and appreciative?
If you are like most people, you may probably be caught up in the stress-driven energy when taking action, thinking about ALL the other things still left to do and worrying if it will all happen in good time, work out, etc. And this negative emotional state we are in when we take action creates more struggle, more resistance, more suffering for us which makes the whole journey towards success feel like one big obstacle course. Why does it have to be that hard and feel so…ugh. Right?
What really got me thinking was why do all the motivational videos and tapes out there consist mostly of men yelling that ‘it’s gonna be hard and you will need to push through no matter what!’. You need to ‘hustle’ and ‘grind’ and take massive action – do, do, do! And so I had done that for a few years which ended up with me burning out, getting sick, and not enjoying the process of reaching my goals one bit. I was constantly feeling pressure and anxiety like I was running out of time and I wasn’t taking enough ‘action’.
Then finally one day I realised the ‘power of the pause’….the ‘being’. I decided to try a different approach that has completely changed the game for me when it comes to manifesting success. It involves finding a balance between ‘doing’ and ‘being’ that focuses on one key principle – your energetic state at all times.
What I’ve learned is most important when it comes to manifesting our desires, is how we FEEL in the process of making them happen. This is the difference between whether the journey towards success feels like a huge struggle or like a beautiful flow of ease and synchronicities.
It’s based on balancing the masculine energy of ‘doing’ with the feminine energy of ‘being’ inside of ourselves. When we are taking action we are tapping into an energetic state of giving. Giving effort, giving value, giving our energy, etc. It is dominated by thoughts and actions.Yet this is only ONE HALF of the equation. And unfortunately most definitions of success are focused purely on this masculine energy when it comes to creating success. It often times leads to imbalance because we are missing the other half of creating success – the feminine energy of ‘being’, of ‘receiving’, of tapping into our emotions and feelings as powerful tools of energetic creation.
When we balance the masculine energy of ‘doing’ with the feminine energy of ‘being’ we reach a FLOW state where:
* Synchronicities happen easily
* There is little struggle
* We only do what ‘feels’ good and get more done in less time
* We notice opportunities quicker and things come to us more easily
The feminine energy of being teaches us that it is important to focus on our emotions as a powerful force of creation because our emotions determine what energy we put out in the world when we take action. No matter how much you want something, if you feel anxious because deep down you don’t believe you deserve it, or that it’s not possible, then your actions will carry that energy and your results will mirror back how you feel about yourself.
So if you are fearful about something, pause and work through those emotions. Sit with them and ask them, ‘what are you here to teach me?’ What do I need to learn from you before I move forward? Most often we get caught up in our fear based stories of thinking things won’t work out for us because: we are not good enough, we aren’t capable enough, we aren’t worthy of what we want; we will be judged, or some other negative story.
When we choose to let those stories go and realise that WE are the creators of our realities based on what we CHOOSE to believe about ourselves, our energy begins to shift very quickly. When we feed ourselves a powerful story like ‘I wouldn’t have this desire if it wasn’t possible for me’, ‘I am capable of achieving anything I set my mind to’, ‘I am worthy of my desires and I always have been’…your feelings begin to shift to match your new story. And when you feel good, you can tap into receiving intuitive guidance on what action FEELS good to take right now that will move you closer towards your goal.
The ultimate goal of any desire is this: we believe that when we achieve that desired outcome, it will make us FEEL something we want to feel – freedom, power, love, joy, ease, security. So why don’t we choose to feel those emotions first, and then take inspired action that aligns with those emotions? For example, ‘I want to feel excited, so I only do what feels exciting to me that moves me in the direction of my goals.’ The result you get will indeed mirror back the emotion that you were in when you took action.
In my own example, when I take action on things that excite me or inspire me, it leads to results that continue to excite and inspire me. Because I no longer am in an anxious state, I can relax and allow things to happen in their natural pace and I don’t worry over things working out in a very rigid particular way. They eventually all work out anyways. Even if it’s not always the exact path I expect.
The Flow State
So the formula is simple – nurture your energy and your emotional state when taking action.
1) Focus on feeling good – do whatever makes you feel happy. Think about what you desire the most and what that would feel like. Appreciate what you already have in your life.
2) In this state of positive energy, ask for intuitive guidance on what action ‘feels’ good to take.
3) Take action and trust your choice
4) Let go of being attached to the outcome and go back to ‘being’ to receive the next guidance on what feels good.
Now you enter the flow state of ‘being’, ‘doing’, ‘being’, ‘doing’. You receive creative ideas and intuitive nudges when you are ‘being’ – trust that inner voice! Then take action on those ideas and nudges. And watch the synchronicities flow to you.
You will find more often than not, you will end up being in the right place at the right time to receive the opportunity you’ve been waiting for. It’s the process of co-creation with something that is beyond our mind. It’s co-creating with universal energy that aligns things according to energetic frequencies. Quantum physics is beginning to bring the science behind understanding energy and how it can be used to create ‘reality’. And our emotions carry powerful energies that we are just beginning to understand in how they influence everything around us.
So next time you are taking action, ask yourself – how do I feel right now? Do I need to clean up my emotional energy first? Success happens from the inside -out! Create it within and you will see it outside.
Wishing you a joyful journey of co-creating your desires!
Dr. Kasia Wilk; CPsychol; DCounsPsych; M.Sc; B.Sc (Hons)